(Note; Please don't think I'm schizophrenic, psycho or depressed. I know myself better than anyone else, and I know that self-talk helps me. Here is an attempt at that. Please don't worry about the negativity. I do actually like myself... I just need to give myself a wake-up call.)
Lauren.... what the hell are you doing?
You've spent the last year working your hiney off, literally!! You've lost 120 pounds, and you're throwing it all away! ALL FOR SUGAR!!!!!!!!! Why!!!!!!????? It's just food! It's the food that got you to be so heavy in the first place!! It's the food that's caused you to waste your time losing the weight that should never have gotten there! Your time has been wasted trying to get yourself healthy! ALL BECAUSE OF PROCESSED SUGARY FATTY FOODS, SODA, AND FAST FOODS!!!!!!
It's great that you've kept the exercising up while bingeing at night, BUT WHY BINGE? You're being a hypocrite exercising so much and throwing your efforts for the day away!!! YOUR CLOTHES ARE STARTING TO GET A LITTLE SNUG WHEN THEY WERE FALLING OFF OF YOU JUST A FEW WEEKS AGO! Yes, fine, you still are at a healthy weight for your height, BUT YOUR BEHAVIOR WILL CHANGE THAT RAPIDLY AND YOU CAN'T LET THAT HAPPEN! You're BETTER than that! DON'T LOSE THE WAR!
It's great that you didn't binge yesterday, but you did eat like crap. Bojangles, cake, margaritas, mexican food, and fried ice cream are NOT good for you!! It's processed crap! Sugary crap! After eating Bos, you felt like you were bathing in a vat of grease! DISGUSTING!!! REMEMBER HOW AWESOME IT FEELS WHEN YOU EAT YOUR HEALTHY FOOD!!!!!! It's a completely different feeling!!!! You feel more "fresh and vital" Please remember that!
You are a beautiful person no matter what size you are, however, you know that you have more confidence when you're healthy. You will be so embarrassed if you let yourself go again. What will people say? Don't let them say anything, Lauren, except how wonderful you look and how inspirational you are!
Come back!!!!! Please!!!!! Your body needs you! Your family needs you! Your students need you! Your "potential future family" needs you! This world needs you!
To my readers:
Okay... so this is me saying I'm back! I will win! I will gain control. I've got this. I deserve it. I'm back.
OMG you are so inspirational..120 pounds!!! I am headed straight to the gym after reading that. You so deserve to do good things for your body after all that hard work! My favorite line is "remember how awesome it feels when you eat your healthy food!" I tell myself "Eat to live, not live to eat!" It is just food, no need to obsess over it.
ReplyDeleteYou go girl!!
{{{Hugs}}}
ReplyDeleteSo proud of you! Yes you are worth it..and you deserve it! Stay healthy and re-read this blog when you feel yourself slipping..! Thanks for the great motivation!
ReplyDeleteKeep up this positive attitude and be grateful that you have your health! Think of all the people that have cancer and have no real control over their disease. You have proven that you can have control over food. You can still do it! It is a battle we all fight every day and one we can win. Love your blog. Don't let yourself let yourself down! Believe in yourself.
ReplyDeleteSelf-talk is great...and so are you! I know just how you feel! I plateaued (spelling?) a few months ago, and ever since then I have been "testing" myself daily. I have been eating too much sugar, fat, and calories...and I have not relished my times in the gym like I used to. I am recommitting to the healthy lifestyle, though, and I'm implementing some self-talk as well. I'll be thinking of you as I do!
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